Does imposter syndrome come up for you?

What if I told you that imposter syndrome wasn't a 'you' problem. That it is in fact a social and cultural programming to keep you from showing up, to keep you stuck in feelings of not being good enough.

In today's episode I'm talking about just that. And offering up a reframe to support you to challenge imposter syndrome and all it impacts.

Let's dive in.

Links, resources & mentions

Imposter Syndrome article Harvard Business Review (and a follow up article from July)

Kelly Diels

Episode Transcript

Laura Jean 0:05

Hello Hello, and welcome back to another episode of The dietitian values Podcast. Today I am talking to you about a hot topic, or perhaps just a common topic imposter syndrome. Have you ever felt the feelings of imposter syndrome. Have you ever felt crippled by imposter syndrome, stuck, unable to move forward or take action. has it impacted on how you show up? has it impacted on the positions you've applied for, the steps you've taken in your business? has impacted on how you show up, in your visibility, in your marketing, in how you work towards sharing the work you want to do in the world with the humans you want to do with? If you answered yes to any of those, please know that you are not alone. Imposter syndrome is insidious, it is all around us. And something I want to talk about to you today, or support you to reframe, is that imposter syndrome is not a, quote unquote, you problem. Imposter syndrome is a cultural, a common cultural occurrence for humans who hold under resources under resourced and dominated identities.

So let's dive into imposter syndrome so first let's get really clear on the definition. Well, it's pretty clear, imposter syndrome is basically having doubt in your abilities, even despite evidence to the contrary. imposter syndrome is also defined as like a collection of feelings of inadequacy so imposter syndrome can show up in different ways. And it basically is a feeling of not being good enough. And the first thing that I think is super important to clarify about imposter syndrome is that it is not a you problem. You and me, and anyone who holds a marginalised or under resourced, a non-dominant identity has been socially and culturally programmed to feel like an imposter. You have been socially and culturally programmed to doubt your abilities, to feel inadequate, because the spaces that you move through, the water that we're swimming in, does exactly that. I mean the whole, our whole culture is built on making anyone who's, let's face it, not a white man, feel left out, feel inadequate feel like they're not good enough, that is the cultural programming that we are all subjected to - imposter syndrome is not a you problem.

Imposter syndrome is a social and culturally curated programming that you have internalised on purpose, not you've haven't done on purpose, that is purposely being presented for you to internalise so that when you show up in spaces you don't feel good enough so that when you go for that job. when you think about building your business or showing your face, or putting yourself out there or being more visible you doubt yourself you question yourself. Why is that? so that you don't do those things, so that you don't continue to move towards ways of being, of showing up in your full humaneness because our current culture, and all of that programming is built to dehumanise anyone who does not fit what Audrey Lorde coined the mythical norm, basically straight white men. And if you are not one of those, then you are made to feel that way. And so, that is the starting point, and I really think that's really important and I'll link in the show notes to an article that I read earlier this year, around imposter syndrome, and those cultural and social roots of it. And I'd really recommend checking that out if this concept or thought or idea is either new or kind of like, oh, resonating for you but you want to dig a bit more i'll link that article in the show notes so that you can check it out. So, when we are thinking about these things, we can think about who benefits? and I've worked a lot with Kelly diels, who's a feminist copywriter and marketer. And she talks about using two questions to help us toggle out or to help us get a bigger picture view, and when we're in imposter syndrome or feelings of imposter syndrome inadequacy, we really narrow down, and we're thinking about us and we're blaming ourselves and we're feeling guilt and shame and not good enoughness. And we're really narrowing in. And one of the tools that she encourages is to stand back, to zoom out and think who benefits, and also who gets off the hook. So who benefits when you suffer from imposter syndrome or when you are stuck in that imposter syndrome and you don't take action because of it, who benefits? it's definitely not you, and it's definitely not humans, that will benefit, and be supported by the work that you have to put in the world. And who gets off the hook? The, you know, people who hold power in our current system. So, it is good to look at that to look at that bigger picture view, who gets off the hook if you blame yourself? The people who, you know, the cultural and social norms get off the hook so we don't start questioning that we don't look at the systems in place. So, when we blame ourselves as individuals for systems, and for cultural and social based problems if you want to call them that, or programming, or hawever you want to term them, when we blame ourselves for that, then they get off the hook. There's no need for the system to change if we're all walking around blaming ourselves for feeling this way, because we don't look to the system. And so when we start toggling out as Kelly Diels suggests, or when we start thinking about that bigger picture view or we start looking at it not as an us problem, not as a you problem, then you start to ask those questions. What's going on here? And it actually gives us a toehold into challenging it because when you start thinking, hold on a second. This isn't me. This has actually been a planned brainwashing, a planned attack on my own confidence and belief in my ability, then it's a lot easier to challenge, it's a lot easier to start questioning, when it's not just build your confidence build your self esteem change those mindsets when you start thinking holy-bejoly mate, this is like a systemized cultural and social programming that has led to a whole swathes of our population, not feeling good enough for a reason, so that they don't step into their power so that they don't well, not step into their power we all we all still have our power inside, like, you know we have a power accessible, so that we don't make steps take steps towards making a better world for us in the other humans that we wish to support and all the humans here, and who benefits from that. And who gets off the hook? well, it sure as shit ain't us.

So what can we do? knowing that, what can we do? because I think it's really important to look and analyse and to look at the social and cultural roots of some of these issues. And I think it's super important that we keep going. For me and the way that I look at it, and you are of course welcome to your own way of looking at in your own values based frame of reference. For me it's about looking at it and then going now what? what do we do now how do we go forward from that versus using that as a, you know, like, my hands are tied, there's nothing I can do this is just how the way the world works. I'm here to challenge the status quo. And I think that we can do that. And so knowing that knowing that this is a social and cultural plan, that it's not an accident, it's not a you problem. Now what? where to from here? If it's not a you problem what does that change for you? if you were to reframe it, and instead of thinking of feelings of imposter syndrome, of not being good enough feelings actually having any basis in reality, not having any basis in you, and actually think of it as that cultural and social programming, kicking in. What then? how would that change how you show up? If you were thinking of it in that way.

And I think there's some real benefit for us as individuals but also culturally and socially around that reprogramming. When we can challenge these ideas that we have, or these feelings that we have about imposter syndrome. And if you're a non diet dietitian or somebody who works with other humans around helping them and supporting them around feelings. You are not your feelings, so I think if we go back to that original definition of a collection of feelings of inadequacy. It's not facts, it's not actually being inadequate it feelings of inadequacy, it's similarly how the clients we work with feel around their relationship to food and feel around their bodies, it's not facts, they're not facts and how do you work with those humans to support them to challenge those feelings, or to sit with those feelings, and just to notice them, But to reflect that they are not their feelings, and I would like to suggest or invite that you can use those same strategies and questioning with yourself, you are not your feelings you are not an imposter, you may have feelings of inadequacy, but that does not mean they are real facts, feelings are just feelings, and they can be challenged. I mean we can sit with them, but I suppose it's not the feelings that can be challenged, it's the thoughts that are behind them, or the story that comes after them, and that's probably the more important thing feelings come up, how we feel. It's the story that we follow up with that often gets us carried away. So if you have feelings of inadequacy and then you follow up with a story of being inadequate or a culturally and socially programmed script, perhaps, that you have been fed, then it will lead you to feel inadequate to act in a way, you know to enact that, and therefore if we can notice feelings but then challenge it, or if we notice feelings and then not get caught up in the story. More importantly challeng the story sorry not challeng the feelings. If we can not get caught up in the story that follows, the script that follows. And in fact if we can rewrite that script and notice. Oh, I'm feeling inadequate. Oh, I wonder who that benefits or one who gets off the hook if I act into the story that normally comes after this, and we can start challenging then we can create a new script for ourselves, we can rewrite the script that comes after the feelings, we can rewrite it as not an us, not a you problem, you can rewrite it as a noticing a noticing of that culture programming similarly again how you support humans that you work with around their body and their relationship to food when they come up with those ideas about not feeling worthy. Not feeling enough and needing to shrink their body or change themselves, not feeling, lovable not feeling valuable. I'm sure that you work with them around, challenging the stories or the states, or the actions to come after those feelings and the same things you can do for yourself. And it helps.

There's benefits, so many benefits and so many flow ons, of course you as an individual, then start challenging that. And you get to think about how you show up in challenging that. And the more that we challenge it and the more that we instead of internalising this the more we name it, the more we call it out as a cultural and social scripting programming, the more we create space for other humans to recognise that. So the more people hear that the less people take it on as a them problem, or you problem, the more people start thinking, well that's actually how the culture, the system wants us to think about ourselves and wants us to believe so that we don't change the world, so that we don't go out and do things differently so that we don't put our work out into the world that will change how people think about themselves. how people show up and how you show up. And so there's a real opportunity to inspire action to create change, to create spaces of questioning and challenging and thinking critically. Through this, but as a minimum, it's just opportunity for us to think about our own like we can keep it at the at the micro at the individual level, but we can look at those broader pitcures as well. And then if we think about that, you know, as I said about who benefits, who gets off the hook, the other thing that I sometimes think about particularly for dietitians when I'm working with them around this and these things that stop them from putting out the work that they have the, the messages and the support and the space that they have for humans out there like instead of putting that out in the world like who misses out the humans that you are here to support, the work that you want to put into the world the business, your business that you have and your, yes your tangible running a business, but also the business, the business you're, you're on this earth, you know that you've got to do, that is not put out in the world if you are stuck in this cultural and social programming. so who misses out when we, you know, when when that story follows those feelings, and you act out in a way of belief around these thoughts and feelings of inadequacy versus being able to see and name them for what they truly are, which is a cultural social programming, which is a script, which is a, you know, a way to keep women and marginalised humans, people who are neurodiverse, people who are gender diverse, humans who are different people with difference, humans with difference, to keep humans with difference from showing their difference, because the thing is, the more we show our difference, the more we act in ways that are congruent with ourselves, the more we challenge the system, the more we say, Hey, you don't have to be that way you don't have to act that way you are still enough. And then we challenge that, and we put that out in the world, and then other people see that and they go, maybe I can do that. And that's how we see system changes so the system is not built to support us, the system is built to support itself, so the more we challenge it with things like this, the more we start changing the system.

And so the first part of reframing, or thinking about this imposter syndrome is that it's not a you problem. It's a cultural and social programming. And now what, what do we do then. Well, my invitation to you is to show up as yourself. imposter syndrome is a feeling of doubting your abilities, or a collection of feelings of inadequacy. And here's the thing. You can't imposter yourself. And I've talked about this over on Instagram @dietitianvalues before so if you follow along there this concept won't be new. imposter syndrome says you can't, you're not as good as you know, will tell you scripts like you're not as good as you think you are,You don't belong here. But if we are showing up as ourselves, that imposter syndrome just doesn't wash because who else can be you. You're the only one equipped for the job right. So if we show up as ourselves if we make a commitment to act in our values and show up as ourselves over and over again. Then we can't, like, that script can no longer play out. There's no script because we're not trying to be the perfect dietician anymore. We're not trying to be that cookie cutter version of a dietitian, we're not trying to be the perfect whatever insert the good insert, you know, social role here, the good mother, the good dietitian the good woman the Good Wife, the good friend the good citizen, the good, the perfect, we're just showing up as ourselves we're trying to be the best us, or actually I came across a thing. I've read the whole concept and it was it's clarified over a long, it wasn't just recently but rather than trying to be the best version of ourselves trying to be the version of ourselves that exists, underneath all of the bullshit, underneath all of the programming. And so, showing up as ourselves is a way to challenge it because you can't imposter yourself. There's no way you can any feelings of inadequacy pop up when you are trying to be yourself, Then the programme that social programming and social scripting is so much more evident because you are then you can't not be you, like there's no one else that can be you you're not you're not an imposter. If you're showing up as you. I mean you're not an imposter anyway. Of course, but it's a nice, well, it's a way that we can challenge it and so way we can reframe it so if we start to show up as ourselves, show up in our own values, then we are that, you know that there's no way to imposter. So that is the reframe I'd like to offer up to you, around imposter syndrome.

And I'd also like to add, I suppose a caveat or an awareness or a caveat to that, or just an acknowledgement is the word I'm looking for an acknowledgement that it is not always safe, nor comfortable to do so. And that's important discernment. Sometimes we feel, sometimes it's good to challenge our comfort, and to do things that are a little bit uncomfortable, and only you know, you can know the difference. And so yes, absolutely, for some people who hold some identities, and in certain spaces, it's not safe. It's not safe to show up as yourself. And I think it's knowing that and bringing our self compassion around that allowing that to be what it is. I think for those of us with privilege, the more we show up as ourselves, the more we create spaces where showing up as ourselves showing up in our full humaneness is the, the status quo that that is what is, that is common, the more we create these spaces for for humans who perhaps, traditionally, or historically have not found spaces that are safe with create spaces where perhaps other humans and humans who have traditionally not been able to find spaces for themselves to show up as themselves that they can start finding those. And for me, that is my big picture vision for the world is creating spaces where all humans can show up in their full humanity, where we have a world where we can all just be ourselves, and you can't imposter that.

So that is my invitation to you to think about imposter syndrome to recognise that it's a cultural and social programming and ask now what? who benefits who gets off the hook, and who misses out when you don't show up or when you don't take action or when you don't take action because you're stuck in those feelings of imposter syndrome, or stuck in the story that follows that? how can you challenge the story that follows it? How can you rewrite that script, and how can you create spaces where you and other humans can show up as yourself, or themselves? how can we create that because I think that is the, the way out of this is acknowledging accepting difference, and creating spaces where it's celebrated versus the current, you know status quo, which is where it's not, which is what leads to those feelings of not being good enough because if you don't look, act, think, or show up as expected as the norm, then you, you know, then it's put on you that you're not enough in that space. However if we create spaces where actually all that 'enough' is in those spaces is to show up as yourself, then imposter syndrome, could become a moot point.

So i'll leave you with that. And know that in spaces, in this space here in this space that I've that that we're creating together, hopefully, over @dietitianvalues on Instagram, and through the work that I do that, that is what, You know, that's what we're working towards is spaces where we can all show up as ourselves where we recognise that imposter syndrome is a cultural social programming, and we say bullshit to that and we say we've had enough, and we go out and we be ourselves and we continue to create those spaces where other humans can be themselves too, so I'm gonna leave you with that. And I would love to hear your thoughts on this, is this helpful, is it supportive? I know if you've been hanging around me, this is possibly not the first time you've heard this, but if it is the first time you've heard this, I'd love to hear how it lands so pop over to @dietitianvalues, and let me know. leave a comment on the podcast episode post or send me a DM over there as well if you prefer. And I will talk to you again soon. Until then, go out there and be you, and kick imposter syndrome to the curb. Until then, I will talk to you again soon bye for now.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai