Ep 3: Productivity and the overwhelming to-do list
Do you put the pressure on to get it all done? All by yourself? All the things?
And then do you end up overwhelmed with an ever growing to do list?
In this episode I'm talking productivity, perfectionism, procrastination and the to-do list. I'm offering up some observations and a strategy of sorts for you to consider to get the to-do list sorted and, most importantly, decouple your worth from what you do.
Let's dive in.
Links, resources & supporting material
Episode Transcript
Hello, and welcome to episode three of the dietitian values Podcast. Today I want to talk about something that comes up a lot in the business area, in the professional area, in life, and it is productivity. We stress, we worry, we focus so much on being productive. And I want to talk a little bit about that, I want to talk about the pressure we can put on ourselves how it can be kind of counterproductive really, and what are we, you know even aiming for. So allow me to kind of thought-noodle, I bring some thought noodles together here in this space, so I did a reel, the reason I was thinking about doing this podcast was I did a reel the other week, about on over on Instagram @dietitianvalues about, you know, putting pressure on ourselves to get everything done and to get everything done perfectly. And one of the comments just really made me think, and a few of the comments you know that this is you know people saying 'this is so me' you know I had these big to do lists of all these things I'm going to do and then I procrastinate never get it done.
1:11
So, a couple of things so first let's talk productivity. What is productivity about often, you know, if we think about it being just being productive, you know the root of the word being productive. It's not really a problem you know we want to be productive at times we want to create things, you know, I think it's human nature to want to create things. However, how we define productivity as a word is really based in, you know, capitalism, which is based in supremacy culture so I know there it goes again I'm often talking about it but it is because it is the water we swim in we are surrounded by it and we can't talk about these issues without acknowledging it, because otherwise what we'll look for is productivity hacks we'll look for time management hacks will look for those things, and I did it too, you know, when I remember, I loved loved a good time management program or somebody you had this new idea or strategy about how to get more out of my time. And then as I started to learn about supremacy culture as I started to learn about that kind of capitalism as I started to learn about the patriarchy and all of those things which are all types of supremacy cultures, supremacy structures that actually, it'...It's not bullshit because it is and it exists but it's harmful. And it's dehumanizing because we are basically valuing ourselves, or we're hingeing our worth on how much we can do, how much we can achieve, and that is bullshit because we actually are inherently worthy. You are worthy. Just because you are. There is nothing you need to do to be worthy. You don't need to have a clean house, you don't need to have a stellar career you don't need to have all these kind of markers of success or money or the new car or anything to be worthy, to be valuable. You just are. However, because the way our culture works. If everyone just accepted themselves and loved themselves and things well then, a lot of those structures would crumble to the ground which Yay, can't wait for the day. So it hinges on getting us to connect. to kind of like hook our cart to to you know to get connected, that our worth and our value is in our productivity and linked to that I think a lot of time that it's that our worth and value is to not only be productive, but to be perfect in what we produce. And you know what happens when we hyper focus on that or when we are so focused on being productive and also being perfect in everything we do and produce and getting everything done and getting it done perfectly, is we feel paralyzed, and we get stuck in procrastination. When I started unlearning this I thought, I really identified as a procrastinator, you know, when I had these kind of inner talk to myself about oh Laura you're so lazy always leaving things to this and you're always procrastinating. And what I realized was, it wasn't so much, it was it was almost like a bit of a, you know like a trying to think of the word. You know, like it's stalled me it stopped me from being, being able to move forward because I sort of thought, if I do anything I have to do it to this certain level, or there's so much to do I'm so overwhelmed I can't even think of where to start. And so then, what we think is we think we're lazy, we think we're procrastinators and we have this whole internal kind of story about ourselves and then of course we aren't worthy because we're not even productive, you know, so it's a bit of a vicious cycle that we can get in. So, firstly, I want you to know that I see you I know you and I was you and not as in because I'm quote unquote perfectly recovered but I was there in that same space feeling stuck.
4:52
The key or the way to get unstuck, is not a time management hack. It's not being more productive, it's not having more efficient to do lists, not having mini to do lists, although some of those things can be helpful to manage stress and anxiety when there are things we need to get done and projects we need to manage, but it's actually decoupling, our worth from what we do, from what we produce, it's decoupling, our work from how perfectly we can get every single thing on our to do list. It's it's it's changing that then it's challenging that challenging that inner critic challenging that inner voice. One of the tools that I found so useful to help with that has been one of course unlearning supremacy or, you know, learning what supremacy culture and all those things are, and really just being really aware of it. But the other thing is self compassion, and having self, having compassion for myself, because once I started having compassion for myself, it actually pushed me to look for what was really going on because, yeah, I mean you're in a lot of this stuff that you probably work with clients around, and there you can draw kind of like a quite a link between a lot of the clients that you have probably worked with as a nondiet dietitian or even as a dietitian and maybe straddling the non diet scope or just interested and curious. That a lot of the clients that we work with they place their value, their connection to their value around losing weight, around changing their body, and that is where that kind of productiveness comes out you know if I can just have the perfect diet. you know for us perfectionist-type-A-dietitians, we want to have the perfect, the perfect task to do lists ticked off but for some of our clients we work with often it's finding the perfect diet, the perfect way to control food, so then that they can find their worthiness by looking and feeling a certain way, and having their body to be changed in a certain way so it's not uncommon to see the links there because, again, it's, it's those cultural and social kind of norms & ideas that are of social programming that is making us link our worth and our value to something outside of ourselves, and that is where the problem starts.
6:58
So, the first, I suppose, seed, I would like to plant for you is to start thinking of the value of productivity, and I'm not talking about the value of being productive, you know, of getting things that you need to get done, done, but just productivity for productivity sake, being busy for busy sake, having these giant to do list of all these things that we have to get done. So how have I started to challenge it I'll share some of those things that I've done, and invite you to consider those or invite you just to take some time to reflect and think about what ways, what things could help you moving forward. So one of the things that I've started to really question, is to really think about, Does this need to be done so there's like a way you can kind of a strategy and it is a bit of a bit of a hangover from, not so much the productivity time kind of time management hack stuff but, but a strategy that I kind of heard about which I've, I've used and I suppose, made it fit within the kind of framework that I'm working in which is to move away from those kinds of, you know, biohack time hacks productivity hacks, and it's. Let me think about it now. It is, Does it need to be done so ditch it, delay it, delegate it or do it.
8:12
So, number one ditch it so does this thing actually need to be done and who says, Who benefits when I do this thing and who gets off the hook. So for example, I was on a part of the 'We are the culture makers' with Kelly Diels, and I talk about it often. And it's an amazing program. It's a year long kind of container for people who are, you know just challenging and questioning the status quo. Anyway, we're talking about, you know, that unseen labor and things that happens and the things that we think we need to spend our time on because this is about you know getting our time back, and again not no time management hack way but really to look at things. and somebody posted a comment. And it was something like 'who says the laundry needs to be folded', and it was just such a small thing that I read and I just thought, yeah, who does say like, who says, The laundry need to be folded, like,what does it matter if there's a pile of laundry on on a corner of a disused part of the house. Now, if that's starting to get you feeling like you're going to hyperventilate at the thought of having messy laundry lying around, then I would gently invite you to challenge what is going on there. Why does that come up, what is that cause, like where's that what's the root of that like is it. Have you been given messages from your family of origin or from the culture or socially around what it means to have things that look untidy in your space. Is it a way that you try and kind of make order around you know if you find you struggle with anxiety or get stressed out quite easily as to where you're trying to make order so is it again is it that controlling the external environment stuff and I know some of that can be really helpful if you're managing anxiety disorders. But what I found really interesting about that was yeah like who, who does say that that needs to be done like. I'm not going to get any gold star, it's not going to impact on my worth on my well being, on anyone, any of the well being of anyone in my family. If there's a pile of unfolded but clean, washing on a little unused spare space in the house so sometimes occasionally I look at the pile I think yeah I'm gonna fold that because I had time and actually if that felt like something I wanted to do at that time but it wasn't something that I thought I should do. So anyway, that was just a really tiny example but the first thing is to ditch it. So looking at our lists and the things that we say we have to do, and getting rid of things. getting rid of things that we don't actually have to be doing, because who says we have to do them, what is the impact if we don't do them and really getting clear on that that's sometimes a good thing to look at because sometimes there is no impact. If my dishes sit on the bench for a week, there's no impact versus if they just, if I wash them up every day, like, you know, I mean, I'm not talking about living in, in a state of, you know, increasing risk of kind of some kind of poor health. I'm not running out of dishes you know I've got a dishwasher as well. These are just the dishes that don't fit in or can't go in the dishwasher. You know, what changes in my life if I do it everyday versus if I just do it every five to seven days or whenever it kind of gets to the point where I go, yeah, probably should do those dishes I run out of something, and I need it, and sorry if that's giving you like, giving you feelings of discomfort thinking about dishes sitting on the bench for a week, but they're just, again, I challenge you just to lean into that or not leaning to like just kind of think about why, why does that feel uncomfortable and who says that we need to make our dishes who benefits from say me getting stressed out about trying to do my dishes, and who gets off the hook. When I focus on that rather than focusing on the things that are really want to do the things I've made a commitment to. And again, I'll reference a great conversation that I was listening to yesterday on a podcast. And this one, this, this episode, episode three, I'm actually recording like the week of this episode going live where some of my other episodes I had recorded early but I just really wanted to talk about this, but anyway I was listening to an episode of the movement maestro's podcast and I'll put the link in the show notes, about, you know about, about how we get things done you know talking about Shante who's the movement maestro was interviewing, James Olivia Chu Hillman who is @inquisitive_human at Instagram and I'll put the links down the bottom and they are amazing at asking such great questions that get you thinking and get you a little bit uncomfortable but actually get you really thinking deeply about stuff and really to the kind of core of it. And it's like, you know, how am I going to get. So they'll using the example of the housework, which made it really resonate to me like are, I'm really struggling to get the housework done, how am I going to get that done, how am I going to, you know, prioritize all these things in my day and my time, and James Olivia said to kind of paraphrase them. It's not a how question, it's a What am I committed to questions, so what jumped out at me around that was is around, like not looking at how, how do I get these things done, how do I set my boundaries around my time and my productivity but what am I committed to doing so you know what, I'm not committed to upholding the patriarchy through having a clean tidy house like a good little wife and a good little woman. I'm committed to challenging the status quo. So you know what, to me that just was like, kind of like a really way to think about. Yeah, that is why I do that I don't just not do those. that housework because I'm all these things that our culture wants us to judge ourselves for so that we kind of stay in line because if we're distracted doing all those things, then we can't be following through with the things that we're truly committed to the things that we know are going to make a difference in the world. So that was really good I'm gonna link to that episode so that you can just go listen and take your own perspective of that. But I thought that was a really good one so, so yeah, so ditch it, so what can you ditch?what is on your to do list, what's stressing you out? what are these things you think you need to do to be productive that you don't really need to do so ditching.
13:59
The second one is delay it often there's things that we have on our to do list or we're running around with them in our head thinking we've got to get them done but they don't actually need to get done now. so pop it down and release pop it down in a calendar pop it down in your phone with a reminder and delay it to when it actually needs to be done, you don't need to hold it in your head worrying and stressing about it right now.
14:18
So ditch it, delay it, delegate it, does it need to be done by you. so hopefully your list is getting smaller by now because you've got rid of all the unnecessary things like folding the laundry. You delayed the things that you don't need to be stressing about right now. And you know what if you do the ditch it. Step effectively, or connected to your values connected to what you value. and to your values and what you're committed to your to do list will shrink, very rapidly. And how do I know because I've done it over and over and over again and the more I unlearn all the patriarchy and the supremacy culture bullshit and the more I unlearn all of those external judgments and external markers of been worthy and valuable and successful my to do list just keeps, keeps dropping. So I really encourage you and I really, it is a challenge so I do challenge you to really sit in that discomfort there and think about what you can ditch from your to-do list, delay the things that don't need to be done right now, particularly if you're in a time of high stress delay those. And then, also, the next step is delegate.
15:21
So does it need to be done by you. So, is there other people in the household that can do the dishes that can fold the laundry, if they so choose. If they get stressed out by the by the laundry being clean but unfolded on a, on a space in the, in the corner of the house well if they do well then they can take over that job, if it's just you, then there's no one else to worry about except you. But if there are other people in your household who you can delegate these things to, and yet sometimes you'll need to delegate it and you'll need to decouple yourself from how it's done, and that is unhooking from perfectionism and that's an episode for another day. But that is an important step of it. It's actually getting rid of it and not getting not delegating it necessarily and expecting it to be done, how you would done, do it or expect it to be done 'perfectly' because then, What's happening is we're recreating that hierarchy that, that, that condition. So then we're just transferring the judgment we would normally give to ourselves around doing tasks and be productive on to somebody else. So, delegating is one that you can for house household chores to other people in the house if that's kind of stresses you out the thought of the unfolded laundry. in your business now, look in the early days of business I'm on the big, big component a big proponent, I should say bootstrapping. You don't have to be, but I want to give full acknowledgement here that I am, I like to build my own website, so I know what I'm doing, I'm doing all the editing and recording everything of my podcast right now, I can tell you that I will be delegating that once I get to a certain point with it once I understand how it all work so that I know how to delegate it properly. But there might be tasks that you're doing that you just really hate your accounts, your taxes, you know, that's the thing I've delegated I used to make myself do my taxes myself and look when I first started out in business like back in the early 2000s It was probably good idea. We'll mid 2000s But then I got to a point where it's actually like, No, this is something I need to delegate so I delegate my taxes I go to an accountant, and I get them to do it for me. So, That's a delegation. so is there things they're just a couple of examples. So sometimes in business yep you're bootstrapping at the start and maybe there's no funds to delegate everything, but have it on your list for delegating so that you know that when, as soon as you get to that point you can delegate.
17:38
So then the, the fourth part of the list becomes do it. And so, when you once you're down to that point, once you have your do it list, then I'd encourage you to relook at that list and look at the tasks- what things move you towards your values? what things help you to prioritize the things in your life you value? what things help you to tilt into the spaces of your world, in your life, that you need to right now, and where you need to for you for whatever's going on need to be focusing? so maybe sometimes it's tilting into your health. Maybe it's tilting into your family, maybe it's tilting into your business. So, prioritizing tasks around that. And sometimes this can just be a different way to think about it so we're not trying to find more time I suppose we're trying to get time back by getting rid of tasks that we think we should be doing, by delegating tasks to other very functional people within our spheres, or people who have the expertise in it. And one note I suppose on that about delegating around the business stuff is. When I first came into online business, there was this real trend of like delegating tasks to, um, quote unquote cheap labor, never sat really well with me and so I think I just want to acknowledge that that's not what I'm encouraging I'm not saying that, I believe, and this is my value set that if you are delegating via pay so you're paying somebody asking somebody else to take on labor that I believe in my values, support that, you know, that we're looking at, at least at least minimum wage for people if not living wage, which is a do two different things. And that we are making sure that, for me, as a value based business owner that that is in alignment alignment with the values that I want to bring into my business, it's just as important to extend those values to people that I am collaborating with or people that I am outsourcing and delegating things to so I just want to note that I don't mean hiring a VA in some, you know, in, you know, you know there's that whole, I mean there is, there's this whole kind of like you know, why would you do this when you could pay somebody X Y, Z, to do something but I still think that we need to, I suppose. Yep, just bring our values into that kind of aspect of it if we are delegating things that paying other people to do it.
19:57
So that's kind of what I wanted to chat about about productivity, and what, what is something to think about a different way to think about prioritizing the to do list by in fact actually getting rid of all of the things that you don't probably don't really need to be doing that, you think you should be doing. So I'd love to hear your thoughts on that. The main thing, or the main part I suppose is decoupling our worth our value from what we do and really sitting with the idea of being productive, of getting the things done, we need to do, and productivity for productivity sake for buisiness sake, for all of those external markers. What, what is it that you want to be doing what do your values move you towards. And a great, another great tool, as always, is your values to use that as a way so you know, does this task move me towards my values so when you're looking at the ditch it kind of part of that productivity list, you can add in that question or even at the end when you've got that 'Do List' right at the end, like, does this move you towards my values as I make these choices I do this, or does it not, and sometimes if you're struggling to do a task if you're struggling to do something, it can just be a little red flag that it's not moving you towards your values. It could be that you are have feeling that external pressure to follow someone else's values. So if I use the housework examples and I'm using these examples because they're everyday examples that a lot of us can struggle with, you know, so it might be that you look at that and go, Well, yeah, doing the washing up everyday folding the laundry everyday doesn't actually move me towards my values it's that doesn't, there's nothing, doesn't hinge on the things that I value you know for me, a couple of my values, one value that it's complete in direct, opposite for is a good is a good use of resources. So, time, money, energy, things for me, my community and the environment that's one of my values. And so if I think about is that a good use of resources for me to do those tasks. No, it's not. Does it move me towards my values, does it move me towards the things I'm committed to be doing. No, and so there you go see you later it's off the list off the to do list it's in the ditch category. It's not ditch for ever, like I say, the dishes do have to be done, eventually, often it's a delegation thing, and sometimes it is something that I do, but it's not, you know, it's, it's, it's delayed, I suppose, and sometimes ditched completely from the daily list.
22:22
So, this is just something I wanted to offer up, I'd be really interested to hear your thoughts on this, so please do come over to @dietitianvalues on Instagram and share your thoughts about this episode, under the, under the image for this episode really keen hear you, or reach out via DM, if you prefer to have your conversations privately. So I hope this is giving you some thoughts. So just want to remind you, as we wrap up and that your value is not found in your productivity. It's not found in being perfect, it's not found in ticking off the to do list your value is there, you are valuable you are worthy, just because you are. And don't forget that, yeah. Okay, until next time, I will talk to you again soon. Have a good one, bye for now.
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